Nearly everyone has heard of the Snuggie Cult by now, but “The Original Fleece Blanket with Sleeves!” was actually The Slanket. Slanket founder Gary Clegg came up with the idea in 1998 as he huddled in his freezing dorm room, bundled up in a sleeping bag with an arm hole ripped in it. His mother sewed the Slanket prototype soon after. Multiplying quickly as the popularity of its design spread, the innovative sleeved blanket soon turned into a pop culture phenomenon. A description on the packaging explains why it’s become an inevitable object of desire for geeks: “Reading, channel surfing, snacking, working on the computer, or playing video games; We’ve got you covered! Here at the warm world of Slanket, we take comfort Seriously!”
While the Snuggie only offers a handful of styles, The Slanket comes in a dazzling variety of colours and patterns. Plus, to make choosing a colour even more interesting, each Slanket has a colour-themed story associated with it. For example, the Moss Green Slanket is paired up with cryptozoology:
The cool temperate rain forests of the Pacific Northwest are home to the legendary Sasquatch, aka Bigfoot. Some speculate that Sasquatch is really the ancient ape, Gigantopithecus blacki. Either way we know one thing, when the beast kicks back after a night of roaming the lush forest, he snuggles in with a Moss Green Slanket. Comfort for every creature.
Some Slankets have punny, trademarked names, as well, like the Royale with Sleeves, a light purple robe fit for a fairy princess to lounge in:
Hear ye, hear ye! By proclamation of the Grand Wizard of Blankets, we hereby present our most magical Slanket to date. If you are traveling to exotic lands, fighting dragons, or rocketing around the galaxy, you’ll want to have your Royale with Sleeves Slanket. Protection against chills, monsters and laser beams! Plus, your hands are free, so piloting your space craft and waving your wand is easy. Space craft and wand not included. Please be a responsible adventurer and remember to share any ancient stock piles of gold with the less fortunate back home.
Walk the Slank, the first Slanket print produced, combines geek-chic black with a pirate theme for extra geek points:
Well this is a fine mess, a cutlass at my back prodding me out beyond the edge of the gunwale, and the swirling ocean below. If only my blunderbuss hadn’t misfired in the humid South China sea air… It wasn’t the water I feared, but the man eating sharks that followed the ship, feeding on the garbage thrown overboard, in this case, likely to be me. If I get out of this, I’ll never forget the mark on their flag… Walk the Slank.
One touch of The Slanket lets you know that this luxurious sleeved blanket is far superior to all of its imitators and cheap knock-offs. It’s made of a thick, super-soft fleece whose 100% polyester microfibers will survive multiple trips through the washing machine without pilling or getting that ratty look that fleece often does when it’s repeatedly washed. Stitching along the hems and seams is flawless, and durable enough to guarantee many years of use. The Slanket is also oversized to keep every inch of you warm, its overflow of material stretching well past your toes; you’ll start to feel the fleece’s cocooning warmth the moment you wrap up in it. (Slankets don’t have pockets for your hands, like the Snuggie Deluxe, but who really needs pockets on a blanket anyway?) The Slanket is so warm, in fact, that you can earn Eco-Geek points by turning the heat down or completely off while wearing it, saving money on your heating bill that could be better spent on things like DVDs and video games. Just one warning: when others see how cozy you are in your Slanket, they’ll immediately covet it, so it’s best to leave spares lying around to avoid having your own Slanket filched.
In addition to the standard Slanket, there’s a Kids Slanket for children and adults under five feet tall, a Travel Slanket that’s cut shorter than the regular 60″ x 95″ Slanket so you can wear it in public without tripping over the hem, and a double-occupancy Siamese Slanket. The Siamese Slanket seems to defeat the purpose of a blanket created for ease of mobility, but, if you’re snuggled up with the right person, it offers an obvious alternative benefit.
The Slanket isn’t all about self-centered creature comfort, though. Dedicated to humanitarian causes, the company is “Spreading the Warmth” by donating a portion of sales to charitable organizations. Currently, these include the H2O Africa Foundation, the Natural Resources Defense Council, and The Breast Cancer Research Foundation. It’s a corporate attitude that Clegg sums up in these terms:
Everyone behind the The Slanket is on the same level when it comes to life. Besides creating a product to make people comfortable and warm, our life goals are not to accumulate mansions, SUV’s, expensive watches and closets just for shoes. What we want in life is to travel the world and experience all its cultures while representing humanity positively. Whether surfing in Costa Rica, snowboarding in Austria, or studying language in South America and China, we love to spread our sleeves and let them flap in the wind, giving back in the process.
In case that doesn’t give you sufficient warm fuzzies, here’s the note that’s attached to shipping receipts:
Thank You for Your Slanket Order!
We value you as a customer and appreciate your business very much.
You are now part of the coalition of comfort. Our Slanket army has one top priority, to spread the warmth. Now that you have your Slanket sit back, relax, and enjoy it!
I hope you love yours as much as I love mine.
— Gary
A tag sewn on the right sleeve of The Slanket proclaims it “The Best Blanket Ever”, and it’s not an empty boast. After getting a Slanket, you’ll wonder how you ever managed without one.
Order directly through The Slanket website.
The Slanket is distributed by The Slanket and its international affiliates. For all the latest news and special offers, follow The Slanket on Twitter, Facebook, and MySpace, and sign up for their newsletter.
Slankets might be quality products, but they do not contain the mystical power of the Snuggie! All will soon realize the greatness.