Tired of sparkly vampires? Are you on Team Buffy, as opposed to Team Edward or Team Jacob? J!NX now makes it possible to express both sentiments on one article of clothing. When you’re out hunting vampires, you’ll definitely want this fashion statement in your arsenal. That way, your immortal enemies will know exactly where you stand on the issue of Buffy vs. Twilight.
The Buffy Staked Edward Hoodie began life as a hugely popular T-Shirt and Women’s Tee, both of which are still available in the J!NX Shop. Since Vampire Slayers are traditionally female, there’s also a smaller Women’s Hoodie, cut to be more form-fitting than its male counterpart.
Thick enough to deflect the marble chill of a shirtless vampire, with a lined hood for extra warmth, the Buffy Staked Edward hoodie will keep you protected as you search the forest for Cullens to stake. Its sturdy, double-stitched seams will survive multiple maulings by Twihards seeking vengeance on behalf of their beloved Edward — if you wear this item in public, especially near movie theatres showing Eclipse, then durability is an important selling point — and the roomy kangaroo pocket provides a perfect place to conceal Mr. Pointy. Just be sure to concentrate on hiding your thoughts so Edward doesn’t read your mind and spoil your special “surprise” for him.
Sparkly vampires are unnatural. You know it; Buffy knows it. The world would be a better place if archetypes were respected and the Twilight saga came to a quicker demise, concluding “…And Then Buffy Staked Edward. The End”. Sorry, Bella. It looks like your choice between Edward and Jacob just got a lot easier.
For ladies who’d like to add a hidden touch of sexiness to their vampire butt-kicking ensemble, J!NX offers pairs of novelty underwear in matching black…
Remember when Cameron Diaz drove the fanboys wild in Charlie’s Angels by dancing in front of her bedroom mirror in a pair of Spider-Man Underoos? J!NX’s Speak Friend and Enter Boy Brief Panties raise the nerdiness level a few more notches by featuring a quote from The Lord of the Rings. The Underoo-style briefs are trimmed in white, a delicate thread of feminine pink running through the waistband elastic, with “speak friend and enter” written in an Elvish font across the front, a context that gives Gandalf’s famous words of advice a much naughtier meaning. Password indeed!
Even less subtle than the Tolkien undies are the Follow the Rabbit Hot-short Panties, inspired by The Matrix. If you’re not a Matrix fan, but still love Alice in Wonderland, then feel free to interpret “Follow the White Rabbit…” as a direct reference to Alice instead. Either way, these black short shorts are soft and flattering to female curves. (J!NX’s underwear tends to fit small, so you may need to order up a size.) Plus, the bunny illustration printed on the hip in white ink is cute, unless you’re Buffy‘s Anya — then it’s more terrifying than vampires.
Order directly through the J!NX website.
The Buffy Staked Edward T-Shirt and Hoodie, Speak Friend and Enter Boy Brief Panties, and Follow the Rabbit Hot-short Panties are distributed by J!NX.